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Are you playing small when you should be stepping out?



What do you really desire?

What makes you feel good?


So in alignment with your skills and things you love?

Even if you work in an organisation or have a business that is not fully what you love, what are some of the things about it you do like?

For the time being, focus on those.

You see, what we focus on expands. If you are in a situation that is not ideal, it may take awhile to move beyond it, but paying attention to the good bits about it (even if they are just small crumbs) will change your focus, energy and often your wellbeing. It also helps you to start to think about what you can move to next.

As an evidence based coach, speaker, podcaster, Uni lecturer and writer, I never dismissed what made me feel fulfilled, fun and enjoyable-and always pursued those. All of those things I do are things I LOVE and that light me up. And of course there are always challenges even in those situations. But there is a deeper sense of I so enjoy doing this that I will work out how to resolve the difficult situation and will not focus on it-and some of the difficult situations are stressful and exhausting. I just push through.

When my daughters were growing up, I wanted to spend as much time with them as possible. So some of my part time jobs were not very fulfilling and some meant lots of hours with very low pay, but the fact I could be with my daughters and have a flexible schedule is what ‘lit me up’. That made the drudgery of the part time job fine because it meant my first priority of helping the family budget while spending time with my daughters was such a perfect fit.

There are balancing priorities and emotions that lead to the decisions about what makes us fulfilled. But often people just stay in their comfort zone way beyond the time they should and resign themselves to a life of mediocrity.

So what is it you love to do?

How can you at least get some of that into your life?

Even if it is just an hour a week. You’ll find that by doing that it brings a different perspective to many other things in your life, even those that at the moment aren’t ideal, but for the time being have to be there.

The photo above is one of my biggest happy places. Trinity Beach, Qld. That path is one I’ve walked many times with the ocean (my muse and restorer) on one side and tropical plants and architecture on the other side as I walk in the beautiful warm weather.  I sometimes dream of moving up there, but know that is probably not in the plan. So what do I do when I visit there? Make the most of every minute there. Be present. Appreciate everything about it. And be grateful.

You don’t have to do what you love every hour of every day.

Or even every day!

Just get a bit of it into your life and you will see how much it positively impacts the rest of your life.

The world is energy.

We are energy.

Like a radio station- what we put out on a certain frequency (all thoughts and emotions have a frequency-the more positive they are the higher and faster the frequency) is transmitted back to us on the same frequency.

Think and feel negative and more of those type of situations will come back to you.

Think and feel positive and you’ll get more of those coming to you.

So if we are loving something we are doing, even if it is just for a short amount of time, we are sending out those deeply fulfilling emotions that will expand-and often give us further ideas of how to get more of it into our lives.

One of my uni friends and I often would say ‘God can not move a harboured ship.’ When a ship heads out to the ocean it then can be navigated along the right path. If it is just in harbour it can’t be guided.

Same with us. As we take one step forward toward what we desire and want to do, we will be guided further as we take those steps. Ideas will come to us. People will come across our paths. Sometimes opportunities will open up as we are more aware of what we want to do.

And sometimes we are led to a slightly different path as we start moving in any direction.

Gotta move to be guided. And being redirected is a good sign. Not a sign that you had it wrong.

Small steps-big outcomes

Once I saw a woman who was a single mother of 2 or 3 children interviewed on TV. She had a passion to write poetry. But working full time while also managing the family on her own left her with the view that there was no time for poetry. Her coach asked her if she could just find one hour a week to write. She said yes, she probably could. She found that hour and what happened was the fulfilment of that hour led to her finding more hours and soon she was reading her poetry at the local library with lots of great feedback. Once we start what we love (even if it is not paid work) we find the opportunities expand to spend more time on it because we now can see how much it fuels us.

Start with small steps as you move out of your comfort zone. A few people I know only had 15 minutes a day to work on what they loved. And they did that. And guess what? For many of them they found that the 15 minutes could stretch to 45 with no problems with their schedule.Sometimes it is saying ‘I”ll do it for 15 minutes’ which seems like a good small part of time that seems manageable which then can flow into larger amounts of time.

Stepping out can be small steps. I refer to playing small as staying stuck where you are. Playing bigger to me, means any small step you take toward what you are aiming for, want to do or eventually walk away from.

Go for it!

And you’ll probably find some big surprises of people who support you, help you and give you further ideas! Enjoy!

Some other relevant blog posts you might find interesting:

When do you walk away?

Suck the marrow out of every moment

What if money was no object?






Published inCreate Your Abundant Life


  1. Such great advice. Thanks Linda! This is a deliciously wonderful way to finish my weekend.

    • Linda Chaousis Linda Chaousis

      Thanks so much Anna! xx

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